49 Steps

What exactly is the meaning of Sefirat HaOmer (the counting of 49 days after Pesach)? It seems like a very strange corridor of the Jewish calendar - seven weeks, starting right after the first day of Pesach, in which we state the number of each day up until Shavuot. Counting in general seems like an unnecessary thing to do, given that we have calendars to tell us the date. And of all times of the year to count, shouldn't we be counting up until Pesach (the time when we went free from slavery), not counting after Pesach when we already became free?

I've learned two approaches to this question that I found really beautiful, and which seem to build upon each other:

The Rambam (Maimonides, in Guide to the Perplexed) explains that since Shavuot is the day of the giving of the Torah, we want to count the days leading up to it because of our excitement. Leaving Egypt, and being freed from constraint and limitation, was certainly a reason to celebrate. But the question then becomes - what will we do with that freedom? Freedom can in fact be totally paralyzing. So, our celebration doesn't end there. Counting the 49 days up to Shavuot is our expression of praise that we have something even more precious than freedom to look forward to. The Jewish people were given a a special mission by Hashem on Shavuot: they were given the task of building lives of holiness down here in this physical world. That moment was like a wedding day - a real kiss from above, at a time when we could have been left to meander. What we look forward to most of all is that day of receiving wisdom, and getting the opportunity to live and grow according to it.

The Ramban (Nahmanides) writes somewhat similarly but also differently: Shavuot is really like an 8th day of Pesach. Just like Sukkot is 7 days and has a holiday called Shmini Atzeret the day afterwards, so too Pesach is 7 days and has Shavuot afterwards. And, this parallel makes perfect sense because Shavuot is actually called Atzeret in the Torah (just like Shmini Atzeret)! So, Shavuot theoretically could have been the day after Pesach! The Ramban explains, however, that the culmination of freedom requires much more time. Yes, we desperately look forward to the wedding day of Shavuot, but no matter how eager you are you can't just jump straight to it. That word Atzeret literally means gathering - meaning, it's a time to proactively collect and culminate whatever came before it. But, the intensity of slavery, and then the miraculousness of our escape, made us unprepared to collect ourselves and piece together lives of meaning and purpose right away. We need time to build ourselves up from the inside. We need to find our footing through the counting of 49 steps. Each day has its own intention, and its own designation as a particular blend of character traits to reflect on. It's a slow process, and there are no shortcuts, but if we go through it we'll earn the gift of Torah.

We have a very special gift, a real lifeline, but one that requires internal work and preparation. There's a children's book author who lives in Har Nof who wrote a colorful book about an ordinary boy who, after the splitting of the sea, is wandering in the desert amongst the people of Israel. We cherish the splitting of the sea, but the morning-after might be the most important part. We forget how relatable that experience is meant to be: going through the most intense struggles imaginable, and then wondering what's next. Once you’ve been given your freedom, how do you piece together a life of meaning, and do more than just survive? Sefirat HaOmer is that time, to make the gradual leap from freedom to Torah, from possibility to actual wisdom.

Shabbat Shalom!